Dad On Duty #41

**********

Grandparents day!

The special visitor days are some of the most trying, from a security and logistics viewpoint. Blessedly we had a LOT of grandparents (and others, standing in for grandparents) in attendance today. It was great to see, and the kids loved it.

But it’s still early in the school year, and a lot of kids haven’t yet mastered the routines.

The mass of visitors in the front foyer is impressive. As the kids approach for lunch, I’m sure it looks overwhelming. I do my best to make a clear path through to the bathroom for pre-lunch potty break and hand washing, then the cafeteria. And try to radiate warm, friendly, safe…through the mass of strangers….

Tori got stuck there with me, all the way through 3rd grade entry before we go eat. She was getting hangry.

As the K’s and 1st graders are leaving lunch to go to recess, it’s really intense. Those kids are trying to flow out, 2nd and 3rd grade are queuing in, and there is a huge crowd of visitors right at the junction. All those humans are moving or milling in the small space between the front foyer, the gym and the cafeteria. Add to that, a few kids need to go through all of us to the nurse’s office, just behind us.

The Boss positions right at the cafe door, gathering kids and pointing at me. I stand in the center of the mass of people, where the kids need to turn, and try to look large and visible. Holding up my hand. It pretty much works; outbound kids lock onto me visually and make it through the mass, then Tori and I turn them to Ruth who is waiting to take them to the playground. Ruth is a great traffic cop in the melee; calm, clear and direct. Tori helps walk some kids down when Ruth is gone.

Tori and I end up eating with 3rd graders, which she thinks is pretty cool.

********

The cafeteria ladies were totally stressed out. There were dozens of adults getting lunches who had never been through the routine before. On top of that, today was the first day for ice cream sales, which is an extra step in the lunch process, generally requiring a person (which we didn’t have today). At one point I saw a knot of kids around the ice cream freezer, looking forlorn, so I jumped in and tried to help. “Got your card? Great….um…we’re gonna punch it with this pencil, ’cause that’s all I got. Here, have an ice cream”. Pretty sure some kids got free ice cream today.

At the end, the chief lunch lady comes in the office to drop money. Joecelyn says “that was great!” Totally exasperated, the lunch lady says “that was awful!” Depended on your view of the ride, kinda like sled dogs I guess.

********

In the height of the lunch melee, I see some kids and a couple adults gathered near the start of the exit line. I walk over to investigate, and a teacher is sitting on the floor. Pretty sure that’s not on purpose…..   Sure enough, she’s fallen and has a slight injury

To put this complication in perspective you have to be able to picture the kid-flow through the cafeteria. When they’re done, the entire class marches to the back (where this incident is occurring), throw away their trash, then line up along the stage steps to exit out the front.

Exactly where they are supposed to start their march forward, there is now a teacher on the floor.

Have you ever seen what happens if you put a rock in the pathway of a line of ants?   They amass on the near side of the rock, milling, confused. If you can get one ant to go around, it creates a new scent path and the rest follow dutifully

Turns out, works exactly the same way with 1st graders.

Really shoulda filmed it; I bet they’d gimme a PhD like they did with Jane Goodall.

************

See ya next week!